New year’s resolutions

4 Nov


I’m a massive advocate for change. I’ve always loved new years eve and the idea of a new chapter, a fresh start, letting go of the old and imagining what the new year will bring.

Even though sometimes we feel stuck and trapped, this is rarely ever the case. Everything is a choice – though this is sometimes a hard fact to swallow.

It’s so hard to make lasting changes on our own. Often those around us have got used to us the way we are, subconsciously they may not want us to change. So it’s really important to have a ‘circle of allies’ – a group of people who can support you through these changes.

The idea …. anything is possible when you have the support of like minded people. So I wanted to set up a group of people who would meet regularly and embark on these changes together.   I wanted to run a course like this because I know how hard it is to make significant changes in our lives.  Over the last two and a half years, my life has changed enormously. I’m so grateful that I now have friends that inspire and encourage me, a job that really fulfills me and a much better relationship with my family. So I LOVE change but I also know how difficult it can be.  Even though there have been lots of big changes, they came in lots of little moments, which at many times felt petrifying. The trick is to find a balance between knowing which aspects of your life you need to change and appreciating what you already have.

There’s a big part of us that doesn’t want to change at all.  Our limbic brain would prefer us to be safe, it doesn’t care how unhappy we are.  Often we have conflicting voices within our minds and we can feel lost, unable to see which way to turn. Sometimes we need the kind gaze of a friend to give us courage to live the life we want to live, rather than living for others.

I believe passionately that each of us has a unique gift to share with the world. The sad fact is that most people don’t even know what their gift is. As it’s usually something that comes so naturally to us, we may gloss over it or just presume that everyone else is the same. There are lots of great tips and techniques to:

a) help you find out what your gift is
b) give you the confidence and a compassionate kick up the bum to get out there and start sharing it

I’ve absolutely loved running these workshops and it’s been amazing to see the wonderful shifts that have happened in each and every person. Combining visualisations, insight meditations, creative exercises and lots of fun stuff to help nudge everyone out of their comfort zone. Watching and supporting each other through the success and the struggles was so heartwarming. We didfun nights out too, a fire ceremony, walking up Ivinghoe Beacon in the dark, watching inspirational movies like ‘Finding Joe’ and we had guest speakers come and share their wisdom.

I wanted this course to be a real mix of inner and outer changes. After all our human brain is designed to focus on the negative aspects of our lives so I felt it was really important to include gratitude meditations as part of this. Sweet appreciation for all the aspects of our lives which we love.

Sometimes a change in perspective is all that’s needed. Sometimes it doesn’t need a massive change but one tiny change right at the heart of things.

Learning to listen to the wisdom of your own heart (you know that tiny voice that you can barely hear amongst the chatter of the other voices in your head, that tiny voice that says ‘leave’ or “I don’t want’ this). It takes practice to listen to this voice and real courage to act on it.

I’m so grateful to the group who came together this year, for really affirming to me that real change is possible. I’m really excited as I’m going to be running these workshops as weekends at Braziers Park retreat centre, in Oxfordshire during 2014.

10-12 Jan
21-23 March
11-13 July
26-28 Sept.

I’ve a feeling these workshops will be even better as people will have stepped outside their routines. Magical things can happen if you have the right time and space. It’s a great way to make new friends and connections too. I’m also going to be writing up the exercises we do in each workshop as a blog so that we can create a wider circle. If you join me on Twitter: SusanEarl@helpmerelax or sign up at my website: then I can keep you posted.  This is a beautiful course which is very close to my heart and I really hope that you can be involved in some way.

As Rumi tells us ‘Allow your heart to be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love’. The rest will follow.

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